Vindicated
by rrdt
Summary: Song Fic A look on what could have happened between Peter and MJ


**A/N:** Inspired by the movie Spider-Man 2 and the song Vindicated. Let's just assume that the guy is Peter and the girl is MJ. Yeah, I know the word vindicated and it's definition can't be seen in context to what I've wrote, but, what the '(vindicated can also mean apologetic...you'll find out what it's connection to this fic if you'll read it...) There seems to be a few lines that are incomplete...I intended it that way...I want to let the song speaks for itself. I hope you find this a worthwhile read.

**Disclaimer:** Vindicated is the property of Dashboard Confessional. Spider-Man and anything related to it belongs to Marvel. The movie Spider-Man 2 belongs to Marvel and Sony Pictures.

**Vindicated**

I intended to sleep all day. Lock myself in my room, accompanied by my own misery.  
But then, the phone rang.  
And your voice came through the answering machine.

"Hi...it's me. Maybe we could meet up by the coffee shop? The way we used to...same time. You know the routine."

I wistfully stared at the ceiling as I listened to your voice.  
Barely a whisper, fading...

_Hope dangles on a string  
Like slow spinning redemption  
Winding in and winding out  
The shine ahead has caught my eye  
And roped me in  
So mesmerizing_

The late morning sunlight creeped through the blinded windows of my room, lighting up the whole place a little bit.

_It's so hypnotizing  
I am captivated  
I am..._

I stood up, contemplated on what to say to you as I started to fix myself up.  
Contemplated on whether to go or not.  
I might as well give it a try...

_Vindicated  
I am selfish  
I am wrong  
I am right  
I swear I'm right  
I knew it all along  
And I am flawed  
But I am cleaning up so well  
I am seeing in me now  
The things you swore you saw yourself_

I went to the usual place, at the usual time, ordered the usual thing and sat at our usual spot...  
By the window. Overlooking everything and everyone.  
I looked at the empty seat in front of me, then gazed outside.  
It all seemed unusual now.  
Without you.

But then, I saw your reflection through the glass.

_So clear  
Like the diamond in your ring  
Cut to mirror your intention  
Oversized and overwhelmed  
The shine of which has caught my eye_

I always tend to forget that you're engaged now.  
For how many months exactly...I don't want to recall.  
I don't want to think about it. Nor think about you.  
How you'll never be mine.

I longed to say a lot of things to you.  
But I never can.  
I don't know why.  
Maybe I'm just afraid to.

Now all I can do is just stare at you.  
Bury the longing I have inside my heart.  
Bury the memories I have of you.  
But I can't.  
They're so vivid, so sharp, as if everything happened just yesterday.

_And rendered me so  
Isolated  
So motivated  
I am  
Certain now that I am..._

I silently watched as you stared at me.  
Hoping that I would say something that I'll probably never will.  
I silently watched as you looked down and smiled bitterly.  
As you stood up and left.

I want to tell you now.  
I need to tell you now.

_Vindicated  
I am selfish  
I am wrong  
I am right  
I swear I'm right  
I knew it all along  
And I am flawed  
But I am cleaning up so well  
I am seeing in me now  
The things you swore you saw yourself_

I ran after you when you left the shop.  
Took your hand, forced you to face me.

You once said you loved me because of my imperfections.  
And that you loved me simply for being me.  
That even with all my flaws, I still manage to be the perfect friend.  
To be the perfect man that I seem to be.

But there was something that I couldn't do nor say...  
Despite the fact that I seem capable of doing things that no one else can.  
And it cost me you.

Will you love me now...?  
Now that I finally have the courage to say what I really feel...

"I love you."

I raised my hand and reached for your face.  
The face I longed to touch...  
To feel.

Slowly, I trailed my hands down your cheeks...  
I want to feel you...  
Even just once.

_So tired of the corners of your lips  
Part them and feel my fingertips  
Trace the moment for forever  
Defense is paper thin  
Just one touch and I'd be in  
Too deep now to ever swim  
Against the current_

And we kissed.

_So let me slip away  
So let me slip away  
So let me slip away  
So let me slip against the current  
So let me slip away  
So let me slip away  
So let me slip away  
So let me slip away_

You once told me that I'm imperfect.  
That even if I try to hide my flaws, they'll always show.  
They'll always be a part of me.  
The same way I tried to hide my feelings for you.  
But they will always be there  
Hidden somewhere deep within my heart.

I know I've hurt you,  
Like I've hurt myself.  
Another chance.  
That's all I'm asking for.  
For this time, I know that I am...

_Vindicated  
I am selfish  
I am wrong  
I am right  
I swear I'm right  
I knew it all along  
And I am flawed  
But I am cleaning up so well  
I am seeing in me now  
The things you swore you saw yourself_

I looked at you.  
Tears were falling down your face, as you stepped back and looked down.  
And uttered the words I was afraid to hear.

"It's too late."

And then you walked away, still in tears.

Left me to look at you one last time.

If I was perfect,  
If I told you what I really felt,  
And pushed away my fears  
Maybe...  
You would have been mine.

_My hope dangles on a string  
Like slow spinning redemption_


End file.
